For the love of everything holy and lovely in this world…….
Why did I choose to do this program?
I don’t think I have felt this tired in, well…… probably ever.
On the whole9 website there is a time line that goes over how you will feel while doing this program.
Now this isn’t how everyone is going to feel, but it’s funny to read and to see where you are in line with most others. I am only on day 4 and hit the tired stage already but my goodness. I am tired! It’s nice to know that it’s totally normal to feel like this.
I don’t want to be a whiney-pachiney, I know I chose to do this but today was really hard! I woke up feeling like I had just run my half marathon again. My legs ached, my head was pounding, I had the chills and sweats, and I felt like I could have slept for another 100 hours.
For breakfast I had an egg scramble with sausage, spinach and mushrooms. I did 3 eggs this morning instead of 2. I was feeling like I needed the extra oomph.
Around 9 I busted out the Kombucha and guzzled some of that down. It was such a nice treat! It gave me a little energy to make it to lunch.
I had left over pork chop, salad and green beans for lunch.
My brain has been really fuzzy the past few days. I feel like I can’t concentrate. I fumbled my way through the rest of the day and then got a call that my sister and her family were in a bad car accident. It was SO scary! After making sure there weren’t any life threatening injuries, my first thought was I need food. I don’t deal with stress very well and my first reaction is to go to food. It helps me, it comforts me, and I needed a cheeseburger! I was sitting in the ER room thinking “I am going to get Smashburger tonight; I don’t even care about this diet anymore”. Most people get the flight or fight response; I get the flight or feast response. When something happens I bolt to the nearest food place. Thursday is the day we go to my parents and we always get tasty food on Thursday nights. I was worried about going there in the first place but then when all of the other stuff happened it shot that worry through the roof!
When we finally finished at the ER I went to my parents’ house and my mom and I went up to Smith’s to get food for dinner. I begged her to get me something I could eat. I know I shouldn’t snack but at this point as long as it was a good snack I felt it was ok. I got coconut water and macadamia nuts. It was just what I needed! I felt a lot better after eating my lovely little treats.
For dinner my mom made homemade spaghetti sauce with fresh tomatoes and Italian seasoned turkey burger. It was SO tasty! My mom is a fantastic cook! Then we made spaghetti squash and I had a huge heaping plate full. I love spaghetti squash as noodles much more than regular noodles. The only thing that sucked is that my mom made a lovely salad, with cucumbers, tomatoes, carrots, and avocados and as a finishing touch she put grated parmesan cheese on top. I didn’t see until after but it was already on. I almost cried. The pieces were so small that I couldn’t possibly have picked them out. I was so sad. But the spaghetti squash and sauce filled me up. Then I ate some grapes and my life was good!
It’s totally crazy to me how much I used to rely on food to help my moods. If I am sad, I eat. If I am bored, I eat. If I am mad, I eat. Yesterday I had to deal with all my emotions all by myself. Without anything else to sooth me. I did it. I didn’t die, I didn’t fall apart. I was able to make it through.
I am worried for the weekend. Being home with all the unhealthy food around me makes me worried. This will be my will-power super test. But I know I will be ok. I finished 4 days, so I am already doing it. What’s another 26?
On a good note I am continuing to feel lighter and lighter each day. My belly chub and muffin top haven’t shrunk at all. My mind isn’t feeling as clear as I want but I feel lighter! Hooray for lighter!
Today’s challenges:
· Dealing with my emotions on my own
· Feeling so tired I could have fallen asleep standing up
· That little devil Sugar-sauras-rex beat up hard on me after lunch
Things I learned today:
· Tuna fish has soy in it. I will have to find a brand that doesn’t
· I can make it through this
· I don’t need food to comfort me
· I kinda feel like a food snob, and I like it
Whole30 fact of the day: whole30 has a facebook and instagram account. Follow them if you start the program, they have good little motivators.
Oh! And I got my Wow drops tonight in the mail. I can’t wait to try them tomorrow.
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